Odds are if you clicked on this article, you probably ask yourself the question “Why do I feel like everyone is more successful than me?”. It’s normal to self reflect. But, we’re here to tell you that question is garbage and show you how to overcome your self doubts.
Well, do you feel that way?
In the bragadocious world that we live in today, it’s easy to fall into the trap in thinking that everybody around you is experiencing a ton of effortless success. Big checks, stacks of cash and humble brag posts about how #blessed and #lucky people are what flood your news feed. It’s causes you to question where you went wrong and why you’re incompetent since you’re not experiencing the same level of success.
What you need to realize is that it’s a bunch of garbage.
That’s because our social media feeds are flooded with a ton of braggers who are either trying to do two things:
- They’re trying to show you their success as a form of self validation or
- They’re trying to show you their success because they’re insecure about who they are themselves.
These people aren’t much happier than you are. If they truly were happy, they wouldn’t have time to post about how great their lives are. No matter what challenges you’re facing in life right now, you can’t let the illusions created by others determine how you’re feeling about your level of significance in life.
It’s easy to feel like you should cave in, give up, and wonder if what you’re doing is truly worth it. But, in times like these, you can use them as your most reachable moments in life to pick yourself up and forge forward. You can’t truly appreciate the feeling at the top of the mountain unless you truly know what it feels like to be at rock bottom.
And, you can come out of rock bottom whenever you want to – but you have to decide to do so.
Here are a few things to consider:
1.) Quit Keeping Up with the Joneses
It’s totally natural to compare yourself to your competition. However, what you need to realize is that you can’t become jealous of those ahead of you. Set a deciding to go on social media to see “when everyone’s up to you”, what are you do is put your nose to the grind stone and go to work?
The reason why you do the former not the latter is because do you know if the second option is the harder route. You know what the second option is going to cause your mental and physical limits, so instead you decide to take the easy road. It’s a choice you make.
You can get rid of all that jealousy and rage just by simply putting down the phone. Go work towards your goals instead. There’s no “post” that’s put online by anyone that is going to change your life in an instant. You’re not missing out on anything except the time you could be spending to get better.
You’re not a victim. Put down the distractions and start to work.
2.) Understand Where Success Comes From.
Being successful derives from two distinct characteristics: hard work and dedication. There’s no secret to success, and if there was, no person would ever share that secret with you. Understand that success comes from applying yourself on a daily basis and you’ll be much more productive and happier.
Your path to success is determined by how long and hard you work towards achieving your goals. And, every person has a different path in climbing to the top. Your path is not going to be the same as the people who brag on social media about their accomplishments.
Just think about the level of narcissism that has to occur within someone in order to post their success online – it’s astounding. Tune them out. It’s just a distraction.
Things aren’t easier for others. And if they happen to be for some reason, who cares. No matter where you’re going to be in life, there’s always going to be someone more successful than you and someone less successful than you. You can’t control that.
What you can control is your attitude and your work ethic. You can control the intensity and the length that you go in order to achieve your goals. And most importantly, you can control the level of self worth that you have internally as you grind it out.
Your success will come as long as you stick with it. You’re going to fail a ton as you try to climb your way to the top. And, you may never get even close to the summit. But that’s not what matters. In the pursuit of material possessions, one doesn’t become instantly happy when they have them. Your happiness will derive from understanding how far you have come along from where you started.
You’re not a victim. Understand that success comes from work and stop asking yourself “Why do i feel like everyone is more successful than me?”.
3.) Expect A Difficult Grind To The Top.
The grind sucks. That’s life. Suck it up and deal with it or wallow in your self pity.
Success doesn’t have sympathy for the weak. You either decide to apply yourself and understand that suffering and disappointment are in your near future for a very long time, or you can go sit like a slug in the corner.
If you’re not feeling like you’re getting an opportunity to prove yourself, then go out there and make your opportunity. Grind it out every day. Study as hard as you can. Work 20% farther than your breaking point. And, have a great attitude while you do it. The power of compounding interest will work dividends for you down the road.
You’re not a victim. Quit asking yourself “Why do i feel like everyone is more successful than me?” and just grind. Your blood, sweat and tears are what will make you bulletproof.
4.) Use Your Fear As Motivation
First things first: don’t let the fear of failure determine how far you’re going to go in life. Here’s a natural feeling and you can use it is temporary motivation. It’s not an Achilles’ heel unless you decided to come become one.
Use your fear as a motivating source to push harder and so that you end up landing way beyond your perceived limits. Every time that you feel fear wash over you, you need to make the choice that the way you’re going to defeat it is through a relentless work ethic.
Don’t use fear as a crutch. Use it as as a slap in the rear end and make it work for you instead of against you. Do you want to sit around with your tail between your legs wondering “why do I feel everyone is more successful than me?” Or, do you want to use that fear to take a leap and see what you’re made of?
You’re not a victim – fear is normal. Quit your sulking and overcome it by taking action.
5.) Tell Yourself That You’re Going To Come Out On Top
Instead of sitting there and asking “Why do I feel like everyone is more successful than me?”, what you need ask yourself is “What am I going to be successful?” If you truly and honestly believe deep down in your soul that you are going to be successful, you’ll find a way to do it.
And, if you think that’s not true then ask yourself this one question: Have you ever wanted something in your life so bad but you failed in trying to achieve it?
We’re talking about long term goals here, not just “I want to win the championship this year”. Odds are that you’ve always achieved, or came close to achieving, what you truly wanted.
That’s because when you truly want something to happen, you’ll find a way to make it happen. You’ll push yourself and keep going no matter what gets thrown your way. It doesn’t matter if it takes one day or 20 years – you’re going to find a way to get what you want.
What else are you gonna do with your life? If you love what you do and you care about it, then why don’t you put some love and care into it? Don’t go through your entire life wondering what could’ve happened. Instead, go through life by applying yourself and you’ll see that success will happen.
You’re not a victim. You can’t climb the ladder of success with your head down and your hands in your pockets. Pick your head up and keep your eyes on the prize.
6.) Success Takes Time.
If you think that people who achieve success at an early age are the norm, you’re wrong. But, it’s not your fault for being wrong. We want to all believe that we can achieve success at an early age so that we can have our entire lives to benefit from it.
The truth is, success takes a ton of time. It also takes a ton of work. Despite what people are posting on social media and what you hear from your friends, the large majority of people don’t just have success with a little bit of luck. The large majority of people have to actually scratch and claw in order to experience success. And in that climbing to the top, they fail over and over and over again.
And, one of the most important reasons why they make it to the top is because they understand that success doesn’t happen overnight. Even if they’re posting on social media have a great life really is, you need to understand that they’re not gonna post all their failures along the way. You’re not going to get immediate results in your pursuit of success. Take that thought of instant gratification and throw it out the window because it’s not a reality.
You’re not a victim. Don’t be soft because you didn’t have immediate results. Instead of asking “Why do i feel like everyone is more successful than me?”, you should do two things: Suck it up and keep working towards your goals.
7.) Your Biggest Competitor Is When You Look In The Mirror
The voice of doubt is the loudest and most frequent voice you’re going to hear throughout your entire life. Your competition in life isn’t the people directly competing with you. Rather, your biggest competitor lives in the 6 inches between your ears and it’s constantly saying “Why do i feel like everyone is more successful than me?”
What you have to do is tell that voice of self-doubt to shut up. It’s not beneficial to your growth. But at the same time, it’s one of the hardest things to do. The biggest battle that you’re going to fight your entire life is telling that voice to take a back seat. Every single one of us has that voice inside of our heads, but the high achievers are the ones who are able to put that negative voice to the side and focus on the task at hand.
The reason why that voice is useless is because it’s just noise. It’s built upon a bedrock of useless insecurities, fear, and excuses that are trying to validate why you should quit. That voice wants to take the easy road and it knows that the easy way out is by quitting.
So, you have to understand that whenever that voice tells you “You’re not worth it”, tell that voice to shut up. You’re not listening and you’re not interested because you want to be successful. If you can do that on a consistent basis and work harder and longer than everyone else, you’ll get to the top of that mountain.
It may take years and years of constant struggle, but you’ll eventually get there.
So, then next time you ask yourself “why do I feel like everyone is more successful than me?”, you need to stop your thinking and answer it with this question:
“What can I do today to make myself grow and make progress?”
Don’t be a victim. Don’t blame others for your self perceived lack of success. Instead, quit being soft and move forward.